Extending Grace

How do you grieve a friend that has grown away from you?

That won't give you the time of day and is making all the wrong choices.

How do you convince yourself that its not your fault, there is nothing else humanly possible to do?

Nothing but love would make her understand.

Some nights I cry.

Some nights I wonder what the Father has in store.

Some nights I just pray that God keeps her safe while I can't.

How do you stop judging and start praying?

How do you stop yourself from screaming at them, trying to make them understand how deep your love is?

How do you extend patience and grace when they hurt you and themselves over and over again?

Grace that keeps being shoved back in your face?

How do I love like the Father when I myself have had my fill loving what seems a brick wall?

How do you get over grief, guilt, worry, and pain in one huge emotional tidal wave?

Only God knows what will happen.

I just have to know that I tried my hardest and God WILL do the rest.

Growing more Virtue

    I am just awful at blogging! But I think I'm getting slightly better, no? Yeah, no.

          So a few weeks ago I wrote about Africa. I have spent late night searching for opportunities to go and serve. I have emailed a few place and have some responses but I kind of at a stand still with no passport (which I will be getting for Christmas. That's how you know you are a big kid :) ). I have had to push my mission trip back to July because I'm afraid it will be registering too late for March. I'm discouraged and it's getting hard to know if this is God's will.

          I fret constantly about doing the Father's will. I feel like I'm not good enough, or will not be good enough or experienced enough. Silly first world problems are getting to me and I am letting myself be too human and not asking God for help. Arguments with my parents, stress of school and work, and the close coming holidays seem to be ripping through me. I am being too much of a teenager, which I hate.

          I am worried that I won't hear from God but I am also worried that I am no listening well enough. Everything is getting in my way and I'm choosing paths that I know I should not. One chapter is drawing to a near and I am frantically trying to write the next one as well. This was not what I planned, but then I shouldn't be planning. God should be doing it.

          My spiritually fellowship has been dry lately. Don't get me wrong I have awesome friends and an awesome family that I under-appreciate. I just wish that there was more. More spiritual down pour. That is what I am longing for. Trying to speak through yourself and minister to others at the same time is hard. Loving others is hard when you have no Holy Spirit. Loving yourself is hard when you have no Holy Spirit. I need more Holy Spirit. As simple as that sounds, it is way harder to achieve. It is going to be hard but I am determined to ask for spiritual down pour every day. 

         The Bible tells us to 'Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways follow Him and He will make your path straight" (Proverbs 3:5-6) and to "Delight yourself in the Lord and He shall give you the desires of your heart" (Psalms 37:4). It tells us to "Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord" (Psalms 27:14) and that "The joy of the Lord is our strength"(Nehemiah 8:10). The question is how do I combine all these things into my personality? In Proverbs 31 it talks about a virtuous woman, 

      "¹⁰Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. ²⁰She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. ²⁵Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. ²⁷She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.³⁰Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised". 

          This woman is who I want to be. She is treasured by the Father. She helps those in need. She is strong, courageous, wise and kind. She looks after her family and has not idle hands. Yes, she is the picture I want to mirror. To spread the joy and light of God. 

The Fruits of the Spirit are another thing I need to work on; "²² But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³ gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law."

Oh, Lord please come fill me with Your light, love, joy, strength, peace, goodness, faith, patience and self-control. 

Help me to eat from the fruits of the Spirit daily and to know more about YOU!

 Please pray for me as I continue this journey to be a virtuous woman of the Father.

One Day

One day I'm not going to care what I look like when I leave the house.

One day I'm not going to be worried about finding the perfect dress or shoes.

One day I'm not going to be all wrapped up in who likes who and who likes me.

One day I'm not going to worry that I haven't had a shower or that I haven't updated my facebook status in a day.

One day it's not going to matter that I have a dead phone and a dead computer.

One day my socialistic-American-entitled-life is going to fade.

One day I want all my trust to be in HIM.

One day I want all my hope to be in HIM.

One day I want all my joy to be in HIM.

One day I want all my self-worth to come from HIM.

One day I want to love Him whole-heartily

One day I want my will to be HIS and my dreams to be HIS and my plans to be HIS.

One day I want to love like HIM.

One day is tomorrow. 

Trending -- Vlogging

So yep,

I'm going to be hip and make all my blogs video-blogs.

I feel like it captures the essence of me better!

The first one

Sorry about the poor video quality and messy room.

Yeah, I know it's 8 minutes but it would take you that long to read a blog right?

What do you think about it?

Like or dislike?

Let me know!

Falling for Him in Fall

I'm so bad at this blogging thing. I constantly say that I will blog once a week but I never do!

Fall has arrived in Alabama in such a rush for which none of us was prepared. One day it was sunny and 75 and the next rainy, dreary and 50. Don't get me wrong, I love the fall and every single thing about it. I love the weather, the trees, the holidays, wearing sweaters, cold nights, fires, everything.
I just don't like Alabama falls.

God has been knocking my socks off lately with his awesomeness!
He has provided me with a wonderful job and promise and hope for the future.

I'm now employed at one of the many chick-fil-a's in Huntsville. I honestly can not complain about it because I'm working good hours and it isn't complicated work.
I'm excited to finally have a job and a constant source of income.

People are kind of floored when I say I want to move to Uganda after graduation in 20 months.

This literally happened not quite a week ago. I was using my new favorite website, pinterest.com, when I saw an advertisement for this book called "Kisses From Katie".

Being bored and interested I do what all smart people do.

I went to YouTube.

I seriously want you to stop reading and look up Kisses for Katie on YouTube RIGHT NOW!

If you are lazy like me and don't want to go to all that trouble here is the link

Kisses For Katie

Were you moved? Did that video make you cry as much as I did?

Did it break your heart?

Well all of the above sure did happen to me and that is why I did MORE research and found this website:

Amazima Ministries

and then Katie Davis's blog:
http://www.kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com/

and then the most exciting website of them all:
http://www.Visitingorphans.org/

So it is decided that I, Alex Worlund, will journey to the beautiful and spectacular country of Uganda in March.

My plans may not be God's plan but I have told Him that I'm going to keep going with this til he tells me to stop.

I have talked briefly with my parents and told them that I don't really want to go to college now.

Much to my surprise, my parents weren't completely against it.

I would rather graduate and move to take care of sweet, little babies in Jinju, Uganda.

 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper and not to harm. To give you hope and a future."

I'm seriously trusting in God to make these decisions for me.

I ask that if you are reading this, please pray that God will give me guidance and I will have a servants heart for Him.

Sometime I look at this opportunity and plan with amazement and fear.

Am I ready to leave my friends and family to go live in a country that will be so foreign to me?

Go to a place that is so very different then the luxurious place I grew up in?

A place that I will have to humble myself to the Lord every single day or I won't make it?

I look at all this and think yeah, I'm ready.

I'm ready to serve, help, comfort, love, hurt, with the people of Uganda.

I'm ready to stretch myself to places I'm not comfortable with..

I'm ready to clean, and work my tail off everyday to serve people less fortunate then me.

I'm ready.

Here I am LORD!

SEND ME!

Return of the Blogger: Matters of DC

It has been almost a month since my last post!

I'm seriously going to have to make reminders for my to post!

So in my last post I wrote some about my life in DC (I never get over saying that!) but since I have lost that journal in the abyss that is my life, I will just tell you.

_________________________________________________________________________________

Going to DC for a month was honestly one of the hardest things I have ever done.

By the second week, I was done.

I wanted to high-tail out of that place as fast as I could.

I cried ... a lot

and pouted ... a lot.

I felt embarrassed that I missed my family and friends.

I never miss home.

I'm always the kid pushing my parents out the door.

But alas, I missed that place with such a desire I had never felt before.

Whenever people ask me how DC was or how my summer was I always say, 'Oh, it was interesting'.

Of course that gets questioning looks and I have to further explain.

I loved being in DC,

I loved the freedom,

I loved working,

and I loved being able do something important.

But the real bummer for me was that I didn't make any real friends.

I made what I like to call 'Facebook friends'.

They are the people that you add as a friend on Facebook, but that is as far as the relationship goes.

I mean the girls that lived in my room were great and everything but I didn't really feel connected to them either.

I didn't know why, but it hurt. 

That was the one thing I was looking for, a friend.

I felt lonely all the time.

It was like I was part of the group, but really on the outside.

I didn't find their jokes funny, 

I didn't relate to their stories,

and I couldn't understand why they did what they did.

I was the outsider.

I was the Republican, Christian, home-schooler from Alabama.

The way I acted was different,

The way I talked was different,

and how I lived my life was different.

I was different.

Just once I wished someone would have got it.

I wished that I could let go of me and some how be morphed into what those people thought was cool or interesting, or part of their group.

But I just couldn't do it.

I tried witnessing and following the crowd at the same time and, no-duh, it didn't work.

I couldn't be transformed to be of the world when I was trying to be of God.

I was just longing for acceptance.

As silly as it sounds,

I wanted someone to cry with on leaving day, as we parted,

but it didn't happen.

On the last night, I sat in my room packing, and crying, calling out 'God why am I here?'

I wanted leave right then and never look back.

I wanted forget that experience.

I wanted to forget that pain.

But eventually, I sucked it up and went out and sat with the group.

The smile plastered on my face hurt because I knew it was fake.

But for some reason I got up the next morning and wished that I had more time.

I don't know if I was trying not to accept that no one cared when I left or if I really didn't want to leave.

My parents came and got me.

The next week, I went home.

Home, Alabama.

The place I longed for.

I was finally home.

But homecoming wasn't as sweet as I wished.

I came home to reality.

I came home to loneliness.

Oh, how I wanted to be greeted back by everyone I knew.

I wanted to know that this was a safe place.

But it felt like a war-zone.

I then wished I was back in DC.

I called out to God 'Why? Why can't you just give me one break?'

Then it came into focus.

I learned things about myself that I never knew.

I learned that I can't go out in the world expecting my little slice of earth to follow me.

People are going to hate me, and as a Christian, I am different and always will be.

I will stand out and in this world that isn't a bad thing but it is hard.

The funny thing is, I still keep thinking, nay hoping, that, even a month after leaving my fellow pages, I could connect with one of them.

Then I realize, it just isn't going to happen.

This time, I didn't make friends, and that hurts so bad.

I'm the kind of person who longs for acceptance and it so hard for me to deal with if I don't get it.

An issue I need to give to the Father.

When I look at them, I wouldn't take back those 4 weeks for anything.

I would make myself better prepared and I would have a better attitude.

I would have tried tuning in to God better.

I would have done a lot differently,

but I am so thankful that I got that opportunity.

So there you have it.

For everyone who was wondering about my summer and had not yet heard the tale.

Quite adventurous and hard and wonderful and frighting all in one. 

NOTE: If you have stumbled across this blog looking for info about the Page Program, please don't let this discourage you.

This was just my experience that could be completely different for you!

The Page Program is a wonderful experience that can benefit everyone who participates!

Journal Entry: Week 1

07/12/11

Day 2, complete.

A little less stressful but only slightly.

I almost got on the Senator's only elevator twice.

I get lost every almost every run and still feel like I don't belong.

Every step, I feel that I am breaking a rule, yet completing a task.

Friday is our test and I feel so unprepared.

Tomorrow I need to do flashcards.

Someone gave me some today and it made a huge difference.

I had dinner with Mom and Mrs. Paige tonight.

I really enjoyed it!

We ate at Pizzeria Uno.

It will be my last time seeing Mom for a month.

Today, we got off work at 4:30.

Tomorrow though, I work late shift and there are 2 votes.

I see maybe a 11 o'clock night in my future.

I hope that isn't the case.

Everybody has been really nice and I've enjoyed the company.

07/13/11

Day 3, complete and I'm utterly exhausted.

Today we were running the whole day.
On our way back from ethics training we got caught in the rain and we soaked by the time we made it to Hart.
Not that fun.
But we did go into the woman's bathroom and dry ourselves with the hand dryers.
That was a funny sight I'm sure.

The Senate adjourned early today so we left at about 5:15.

Tomorrow we are supposed to get off early and Friday, if they aren't in session, the same.

Tonight, after work, some of us went to Union Station to get dinner and went to Pizzeria Uno.
Good food and reasonably priced too.
We were walking around and someone asked what Bojangles was.
I was pretty much in shock.

It seems weird that every where doesn't have the same places that Alabama does.
But everybody seems open to trying and learning new things.

I'm learning too.
I'm finding that Huntsville is a lot smaller then I thought.
Also, that everybody is raised different then me.
Some, a lot differently.

They talk about things that I would never even think about and say things I wouldn't say.
I'm learning, talking isn't always necessary.
Being quite can help you.

Friday is our test, and with help of my amazing Republican coworkers, I'm going to ace it.
Some people are worried and I feel like I should be too.
But I'm not.

Home At Last

What a crazy fun month it has been.

The things I have learned, seen, heard, and tasted are indescribable.

So many firsts but not lasts.

Where to begin.

Well readers, if you didn't know, I was participating in the United States Page Program.

I was hydrating Senators, delivering Bills and Amendments and going places the average person can not go.

I met Senators, I "helped" solve the Debt Ceiling Crisis and essentially learned more about our government.

I spent most of my time between Webster Hall (my dorm), the Capitol, the Capitol Hill Super Market, and Union Station.

I met some awesome new people who were different then me.

I learned more about myself, my God, and our World.

Tomorrow, I start my journal entry blogs.

First week in DC

Hi everybody! Greetings from Washington DC!

By now most of you know where I am and what I'm doing.

Since I am working and I signed a contract I can't say specifically but if you go back a few blogs I bet you can figure it out.

I'm going to post a couple of journal entries for ya'll just so you can get a little slice of my life here.

07/10/11

I got checked in today and it has been constant rushing since.

Everyone has been very friendly since I got here.

I have 5 other girls in my room, they are from Maryland, California, Utah, Iowa and Oklahoma.

We all are in lofted bed with scary ladders and little railing.

I fear everytime I go up and down that I will fall and kill myself.

We have two showers which makes everything easier in the morning.

07/11/11

Today was our first day at work. 

The first part was a little boring but the rest was pretty busy.

We learned how to do everything and then my first job was to bring water to one of the Senators.

We ran letters and amendments and roll calls. 

Except we never run.

We walk with a purpose.

We found a letter from the girls who stayed in our room before us and then tonight they 6-way called us. 

Apparently there is a secret book that has been in our room for 30 years.

I'm sure it has amazing and interesting things I would love to read about.

They won't tell us were it is hidden but said they would call back next week.

The people are nice and the food in the cafeteria is decent enough.

Of course there is always that one girl who has a boyfriend back home that she calls every night.

That girl just so happens to be my roommate.

We get a kick out of listening to here.

Everybody is different and so I have my ears, heart, eye and mind open to enjoy every minute of it!

Day 2. Journal Entry 1

Saturday, July 09, 2011 7PM

Day 2 in DC,

 We got here with little to no trouble yesterday afternoon. Everything went fine with the plane.

We flew from home to Baltimore, from Baltimore we rode the Marc and then transferred to to the metro. Metro travel is a little interesting to say the least.

Yesterday afternoon, I went to Georgetown with Mrs, Donnie, the boys, and Emily.

We went to explore and go to Georgetown Cupcakes. Georgetown Cupcakes was so good!

I got a chocolate mocha and mom a chocolate pb.

They were phenomenal.

We waited for about 20 minutes, but it was well worth it!

We put the boys in the strollers because it started raining a bit.

Let me just say that pushing 5 year olds in strollers on brick paved streets, with crazy people rushing by, is not the easiest.

I mistakenly wore flip-flops and by the time we got home, my feet were ready to fall off

It makes me happy that my work shoe are Dr. Scholls.

Last night we went to dinner with Katie and her mom, Mrs. Wendy.

We had a little miscommunication about meeting, due to the lack of directional skills of two teenage girls.

Once we got together, though, we had no problems.

We ate at the Old Ebbitt Grille.

I had the crab cake and mom had the canntelloni and the seafood was sooooooooooo good!

I've had Southern seafood and it is nothing compared to New England seafood!

After we left, we tried to go see the White house but since they are trying to 'refurbish the grass' we could get there very fast.

We decided to go see where I am going to stay, Webster Hall, but it was pretty dark so we turned around and head back to the metro.

This morning, we left the hotel right after I woke up and then we walked over, with our luggage, to the Anderson's appartment.

After we put all of our stuff up, we went to the Eastern Market.

It was very hipster there.

You can find alot of different thngs there.

We were pretty hungry so we found this interesting resturant, Tunnicliff Cavern.

We shopped around for bit and I bought a couple of things and then I found a pellhat.

The boys got tired, so the Anderson's went home and we went to the American History Musuem.

We went for the First Ladies' dresses and other items.

After that we came home and now we are eating meatloaf for dinner.

The boys are playing with the planes that Mom and I bought them in the Smithsonian.

Tomorrow Mom drops me off at Webster Hall.

My adventure starts soon.

_____________________________________________________

Food Ratings:

Au Bon Pain - Crystal City: ** 1/2  (2 and 1/2 stars)

Good salad, fast to-go service, fairly affordable. Perfect for a quick and easy lunch that provides variety.

Old Ebbitt Grille - Near the White House: **** (4 stars)

Amazing seafood, amazing crabcakes. Great chocolate brownie desert. Pretty good service but very loud.

Tunnicliff Cavern - Eastern Market: ** (2 stars)

Slow service, onlycomes when passing by. Food is great. Burgers and fries are pretty great but the salads are pretty mediocrea.

Orange Cow - Eastern Market Truck: *** (3 stars)

Yummy, inexpensive ice cream. They were sold out of peanut butter cup and from what the cashier guy said, it was sold out the hour they are opened.

Georgetown Cupcakes - Georgetown: **** (4 stars)

Cupcakes are to die for. The Mocha was devine, lemon was dreamy, and the chocolate pb was by far the best! The icing tasted like peanut butter fudge.

The big day is here!

It's here.

The big day!

in 14 minutes we are supposed to be leaving for the airport.

Not to sound like a little Alabama girl or anything but,

this is me first plane ride.

And the first of many I'm sure.

It seems crazy that it is here all of a sudden.

It seems like it came all too fast and not fast enough at the same time.

Funny how things happen like that.

Words can not be placed to my excitement, fear, stress, hope, and happiness!

Going with no computer, this might be my last blog for a bit.

Maybe a week, maybe 5 weeks.

But trust me, I'm keeping a journal.

Everything I see, feel, hear, taste, is going in the journal and I'll report back to here when I get home!

Wow that is months of blogs!

Yes!!

So for now, as always,

Alex

One last blog before DC

It crazy to think that tomorrow is the day before I leave.

24 hours.

1,440 minutes.

86,400 seconds.

That is what is standing in between me and a plane.

A plane that is going to take me to a place that can change me.

Change me in a  good way...

or a bad way if I let it.

I have chosen to submerge myself in a world that is completely not of my own.

A world of black suits, and elections.

Of hard stone buildings and hard hearts.

A world outside the protection of my family and friends who love me and help me when I fall.

As the seconds, minutes, and hours fall away, slowly but surely does my confidence falls too.

Anxiety and fear have begun to creep in.

I'm leaving Alabama, my home.

The place where I grew up and where everything is comfortable.

I'm going to Washington DC, a foreign territory.

The place where I'm going to have to deal with things I never have before.

So I will submerge myself.

Take a breathe and jump.

Surround myself in the peace of God.

"For I can do ALL things, through CHRIST who strengthens me!"

Playing a little Catch-up

4 days.

15 hours

44 minutes

and 

40 seconds

until I board the plane to DC.

Kind of lame, counting down, I know.

A lot of stuff has happened since I blogged 16 days ago.

We are *finally* getting our roof fixed from the tornado back in April.

This is the mess that has been happening since Friday:

Shingles in the front yard

Dumpster full of mess!

I am so over being woken up by hammering at 5 in the morning.

Also, this puppy,

turned 1!

And this girl,

Spent almost 2 weeks in Nashville practicing "Annie in a nutshell". 

It was Annie the musical shortened.

And on Monday I received this;

in the mail along with an orientation book and a letter.

The letter informed me - 13 days before orientation - that I am to know the names and how they are spelled and be able to recognized the faces of 535 senators and representatives.

13 days!

So immediately I started.

Then I realized that some of these names I can not pronounce, such as this name

or this one

or this one

So I googled  and found a website that told me that this name,

is pronounced

Fah - la - o - mah - vu - en - gah

and this name

is pronounced

Sehn - sehn - bren - na

and this name

is pronounced

A - kah - kah

But some names I did know, and some I thought I knew.

Like this name

Sewell, easy enough.

You would think it would be pronounced

See - well.....

See - well, that isn't how it is pronounced.

This name is said like

Seal.

Crazy right!

I guess that is just the business of working in politics, learning funny names.

Dreams Of Tomorrow

Have you every wanted to be someone or do something that inspires people?

Have you ever wanted to be the best person that you could ever be?

Wanted to do everything, accomplish everything, see everything, be everything?

Change the world?

I do.

I want to make people notice me.

I want people to see me and know who I am.

I want to inspire people.

I want to be know for making hurt people better,

For making the sad, happy.

For giving hope in a hopeless world.

I want to change the world.

My life is a endless amount of wants, mayb

es, and could-bes.

I want to travel the world.

If I could I would jump on the next plane out of the country tomorrow.

Go some where no one knows me.

I want to be inspired by the world around me,

the God in me,

and then turn around and do it again the next day.

Lately I can't seem to learn enough, or experience enough, or see enough.

My life feels so dull and lacking lustre.

So bland and boring.

So not, colorful enough.

One day I am just going to leave, tell know one where I am going,

no one where I am from.

Live for the tomorrow of life.

I want to see places that inspire,

meet people who inspire,

hear stories that inspire.

I want to know what the world looks like, not just see through pictures or hear from stories.

My feet want to run and run and run until I reach every knook and cranny of this beautiful world.

I want to marvel, to wonder, to learn, to laugh, to cry, to understand.

Until then, I'll dream, and live, and yearn for those days.

That thought makes me weep for joy and sorrow.

For joy that someday maybe I can be honored by the adventures I am given.

For sorrow because tomorrow year seems to far to stand.

What I Should Be Doing

As it turns out, this weekend has kind of been a bummer.

I'm sick.

Okay, well, not really cough-cough-flu-virus-sick

More like I-want-to-sleep-until-I-die-cut-off-my-legs-can't-eat-losing-6-pounds-in-2-days-sick.

Yeah it is wonderful.

And totally what I want to happen 26 days before I leave to go out of town, by myself, for a month.

And also totally what I want happening the night before my sweet 16 birthday party.

I could tell my wonderful experience on Thursday night/Friday morning but it is a long, painful, boring, and not very interesting

so

I'm just going to tell you the things I should be doing during all this free time, instead of watching Netfilx, sleeping, and watching TV

(Remember, I like making lists)

1. I should be reading the 5 library books I have that are due on Wednesday

2. I should be coming up with a term paper topic

3. I should be doing more laundry

4. I should be eating something more stable then a handful of chips and a couple of M&Ms

5. I should be outside helping my Dad clean up our swimming pool

6. I should be finishing Algebra I

7. I should be at my mom's cousin's wedding shower

and

8. I should be researching what senators do

But for some reason I just don't feel like it

Lists, planning, summer, DC and more lists

Obviously it is very cliche to say that 'This summer is going to be the best summer of my life' but honestly that is the way I feel.

This summer I have awesome opportunities!

There are so many things I want to do and see.

Science shows (sorry, psychology is kind of my thing) that people who visualize, make lists, and goals, achieve goals, seize opportunities, and ultimately improve life quality by 80%.

Therefore I like to visualize and make lists.

I make them all the time.

I made one for things I want to do before I die.

I was the kid who always had every birthday party planned like 6 months in advance.

Yeah, I was such a cool kid.

This summer I want to try new things, meet new people, eat new food, go new places and ultimately be put out of my element.

This summer I want to be the summer of newness.

It seems like this summer has just started but is already half way over.

But yet I still have a month before I leave for 3 1/2 weeks in DC.

Well 31 days to be exact.

Crazy, 31 days and the only thing that I have for my trip is my uniform, shoes, and 2 pair of shorts.

Not even a plane ticket.

So prepared, I know.

I just wish I was there already!

I just want to be there!!

I want to explore the city and live in the DC moment.

Suddenly, a city I never thought about, is always on my mind.

I promise you my last 4 dreams, well that I can remember, were about DC.

Sad, I know, but hey you would be excited too!

Seriously tell me you would not be excited about getting the opportunity to work in this building

5 days a week!

So to end this blog that is way over due,


(Seriously, I haven't blogged since April 12th. Almost a month! I am ashamed to call myself a blogger)

I will finish with the thing I do best!

1) A list for what I want to do before I get to DC

1. Educate myself on more political happenings (A must)

2. Further educate myself on choice of career (Neurology)

3. Become a better organized person (Another must)

4. Lose 15 more pounds (A personal must/desire)

5. Push my photography business to the potential of my abilities

6. Stop stressing small stuff

7. Become a better person/sister/daughter/friend

8. Make others happy before myself

9. Make an effort to worship God with my life

10. Become a better blogger (I need to before DC, so that I can share my experiences with all you lovely readers)

2) A list for what I want to do in DC

1. Go places I have never been before, try things I never done

2. Document everyday

3. Make new friends (Dumb I know but very important to me)

4. Learn from the experience

5. Make a difference (Probably not possible but just maybe)

6. Try harder

7. Encounter and overcome obstacles

8. Be a hard worker

9. Smile a lot

10. Enjoy every moment

and

3) A list of what I want to do when I get home from DC.

1. Start the school year with a splash

2. Be a better person/sister/daughter/friend/student

3. Get a jump start on college and scholarships

4. Get a job

5. Really push my photography business to its potential

6. Fall in Love with God

7. Love deeper

8. Do things I haven't done

9. Live to my potential

10. Do things differently and better then before

So there it is dear readers.

The list that I hope guide my summer and afterwards.

To be continued are my summer adventures and more!

Thanks for reading and happy summer!

Sleeping blog

Lately I have gotten in the habit of writing blogs half way through, get bored with them or realize that they are pointless, then stop writing them.

Then is is another week before I actually finish a successful one.

Another thing I have been doing lately is wishing that I had a better blog style.

You maybe asking yourself, 'What the heck is she talking about?'

Well, I will tell you.

My blogs are boring.

Spiritual, yes

Entertaining, no.

Or so I find.

You know it is pretty sad when you have to google things to talk about.

Alas, I must do so in order to create a readable blog.

So sorry to all you people reading this.

I know that once again you have read another boring Alex blog.

I hope you didn't fall asleep.

That would be pretty sad.

I can see it now.

Some of you people are just reading so that you can fall asleep at night.

While that should hurt my feelings, I find that quite amusing.

I think people sleeping at odd time are amusing.

Falling asleep in church,

Falling asleep during a meeting,

Falling asleep in class,

Falling asleep at a friend's house (when you aren't supposed to be sleeping, Dad)

People falling asleep are just plain funny.

And the noises they make.

I must admit that I too make funny snores.

One time my mom swore that there was a cat in the house

Turns out it was me snoring.

Yes, I am quite fluent in the art of animal noises while asleep

Yeah, I am just that talented

The All-Powerful One

So you should all know that by now I have the amazing privilege to be a United States Senate Page but I don't think I shared the story of how it came to be. Let's start at the beginning shall we. In the 9th grade I learned about the Page Program in school and at the time I really wanted to be in government. I would still like to be in politics but I am not completely sure. I got really excited and googled (Yes, I google quite frequently) it that very afternoon. Of course for some reason I found squat about it. After digging, and digging, and digging and more googling I FINALLY found something that gave me more info and OF COURSE I was too young. I forgot about it for a year and then I was thinking randomly about it in November so I once again googled it. I contacted both of my Senators and I found that Senator Richard Shelby had an opening for Fall 2011/2012, Spring 2012 and Summer 2012. I requested an info packet and pretty much jumped up and down when I got it! I did everything I could, I wrote a letter, a resume, got my transcripts and asked for recommendation letters. When the holidays came around, I got so busy that I forgot about my application until I came across it in January. Then I really got down to business and and I remember my excitement as I slipped those papers into that Manila envelope. As we drove to the post office I prayed over the package. God had gotten me this far so it was up to Him if I went any further. I prayed with urgency, worry, fear, excitement, and hope. It really was up to him. I had people praying for me, I prayed for me and I tried to delight myself in the Lord. I longed to go and experience DC by myself in a way not a lot of people did! I wanted it so bad that I thought I would be crushed if I didn't get it! In March I had a ton of worries and a lot of anxiety. God came to me and told me that I would be fine if I didn't get into the program. Another part of my brain just kept on saying 'I want this so bad'. I literally mentally fought myself for 20 minutes and I finally said 'Okay God, you know what? I give up.' I gave up and let myself let go of that immense burden I put on my own shoulders. That was Sunday night. On Tuesday I got a call from Senator Shelby's office saying that the person who was supposed to be coming for their July session had to drop out and that they were looking for someone to fill in. I know that the girl I was talking to couldn't possible pick this up over the phone, but I was seriously about to have a heart attack. I, without pausing or thinking for a split second, said of course. She told me I would hear by the end of the week. I probably screamed and jumped up and down for 10 minutes. The rush of excitement hit me and I believe a rush of panic hit my parents. My mom said that the only reason they let me apply was that they never thought I would get it (Yeah, they were so encouraging). The summer session wasn't really what I wanted but I was going to jump at the opportunity! Thursday, 2 days later, I got the call. I was it. I called my parents, my grandparents, and it was on Facebook almost instantly. God really taught me a lesson this time by giving me the desires of my heart. From the very beginning I gave this situation to Him and trusted and He worked His miracles and gave me, a little Alabama girl, the opportunity of the lifetime. There are still many questions and what ifs as of right now, but I just have to trust every single day that His will is for this and He will work it out. I wait everyday for the mail hoping that the package will come that day. I ask that you, dear reader, will pray for me. Pray that God gives me and my parents peace. Pray that God will give me the finances to reach DC and support myself for that wonderful month. Pray that while I'm up there God will draw me closer to Him. Thanks, and remember God is the All-Powerful One!

I Bet She Hates Them Jubbly-Jubs

So you know those random conversations you hear as you pass somebody in the store or hear at a restaurants as you wait for your meal?

The conversations you almost feel embarrassed to be listening to?

Yes, those.

My favorite kinds of conversations to listen to are;

A) Break-up stories

B) Conversations about family/coworkers/friends that aren't the nicest

C) Stories that involve passionate black women.

And D) Awkward first date conversations

Example A) I was sitting in PF Chang's and a girl who was probably, I don't know, 16 or 17 was going on about how she didn't know what went wrong with her relationship.

Apparently she was doing all the right things,

Calling him every night,

Cleaning his house,

Cooking his food.

She figured everything was okay and that he was going to propose the night he broke up with her.

Sounds to me that boy wanted a maid, not a girlfriend

Example B) One day we were in Sam's Club getting things and we were walking down a aisle and we crossed paths with a couple of black ladies.

The only thing I heard out of that conversation was, 'I know she can not stand to look at herself in the mirror with all them jubbly-jubs'.

I kid you not, those are the exact words.

We just figured that 'jubbly-jubs' are fat.

I think that we would be right about that guess.

Example C) A lady was on the phone with someone saying that she wouldn't believe that Shannon was letting that [insert mean word] fool live in her house.

She the proceeded to say that he was going to get all her babies kilt and if she didn't kick him out she (the lady on the phone) was going to call the police and get them babies.

The person said something on the other line then the lady said, 'I don't care if their momma is a good person, if you lay around all day smokin weed, you ain't supposed to be feed no kids'.

Except with a few more.... colorful words inserted.

And finally we come to my most favorite:

Example D) Girl: So, you grew up in Chicago?

Guy: Yeah

Girl: Oh, was it nice?

Guy: Yeah

[Long awkward pause]

Guy: What do your parents do?

Girl: Well my dad is a lawyer and-

Guy: Oh so your dad is rich?

Girl: Yeah something like that

(Seriously these words were actually spoken.)

I bet you can guess who picked up the tab

Ahhh, the joys of conversations we aren't supposed to hear.

Let's Get Physical

The gym.

A love/hate relationship for most Americans, including myself.

I love the results I am getting from it.

I hate having to actually go and sweat.

Trust me, I love the outdoors, just not sweating or doing anything that involves too much running, walking, or sweating.

Hence, I have thunder-thighs, a pot-belly, flabby arms, and a double chin.

If only there was a magic pill that I could take that would shrink me without having to sweat!

Okay, so I go to the gym and workout, and for the first week I hated it.

Then I found out I can hook head phones and listen to the TVs as opposed to reading the captioning!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

Amazingness!

Who Could You Be?

When I was younger, I always wanted to be something.

Didn't we all?

Whether it was a fireman, astronaut, or doctor, we all wanted to grow up and be something.

We had dreams we wanted to achieve and we wanted to be successful, even if we weren't sure what successful meant or looked like.

For me, I had a new career path every day it seemed.

Veterinarian, princess, nurse, stay-at-home mom, fashion designer, chef, psychologist, photographer, lawyer, politician, senator, and those are just the ones I can remember.

I love that for anyone the choices are unlimited. You could be anyone you want.

There was a little kid song one time, I think it was from Barney.

Okay, so I'll admit it. I love Barney. He was the bomb when I was little and I still can sing almost everyone of his songs. What? They were catchy.

Anyway, Barney sang a song called, 'Who Would You Be?'.

The lyrics, 'Who would you be? Who would you be if you could be anybody? Who would you be?' and the singer burst into different career paths, blah blah blah

(Now that I think about it, I think Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen sang that... Okay, you caught me, I liked them too).

That song was awesome to me because it told me I could be anything I wanted.

So of course, I picked the crazy, impossible, only-that-weird-Jimmy-kid-from-science-could-do, things.

Yeah, yeah, so I was some what of an over-achiever as a kid.

Yes, I did want to build some pretty crazy things, and I did want to be successful from a very young age, but to me that was fun!

It was fun letting my mind run wild and to try doing the impossible things as a child.

I figure, that is why, at 15, I have my own photography business.

As a child, I created a passion inside my self to achieve the unachievable.

To do things differently then everyone else.

To dare myself to reach for goals and dreams that may be out of my reach.

To be unafraid of being myself, no matter what that self looked like.

It bothers me when parents tell their kids that they can not do something because they are not big enough, or old enough or that isn't the way it is supposed to be done.

Somethings, I understand, but why not let your kid draw out the lines?

Why not let your kids help you make dinner?

Why not let your kids have fun and explore?

Why not let your kids get dirty?

I understand limits must be set, without them there is no discipline, but let go and have fun one day.

Let your kid get dressed them self.

Or have them pick what's for dinner (Yes I understand you may have to have mac & cheese. Or heaven forbid, McDonald's, but is that really going to hurt you?)

Or let them show you how they do something?

Ever wonder how they have such rockin' dance moves?

Or how to play that video game?

As we get older we forget what it was like to be a kid.

To be carefree, and to laugh at silly things, or be crazy sometimes.

I did all of these things and I turned out okay.

I have parents who love me and inspire me to reach goals.

I learned that nothing is impossible if you have a right heart, will power, and God on your side.

I know responsibility, and I have a good sense of humor.

I know how to cook and I know I hate the taste of alcohol.

I know that sometimes it is okay to laugh at yourself, and it isn't the end of the world if I make a silly mistake.

Seriously, is that so bad?

I mean, this summer I am traveling to Washington DC to be a page for the United States Senate. I have been offered many different opportunities because of my academic excellence, creativity, hardwork, and leadership skills.

If I thought these goals were too hard or not worth it, I would have given up long ago.

I maybe still a kid, but I do know what being a grown-up feels like and I do know a thing or two.

Responsibility, is one thing, but growing up is another.

I mean who really wants a 4 year old who sounds like a 34 year old.

You take the cuteness factor right out!

So my last words for this blog are this;

One day let your kids open your mind and eyes back up to the wonders of their world. Trust me, it is worth it!

Dissection of the list: 11-20

More dissection.

11. The smell of the ocean - For me it is synonymous with laughing, family, love, and happy times. That is truly awesome.

12. Laughing at funerals - When I say this I don't mean it in a mean or disrespectful way, I mean it in a happy way. When you are able to laugh during a time of sorrow it is okay. It's okay to laugh and remember the happy times of the life the deceased has lived

13. When your Grandma waits on you hand and foot - That is the best. It really show me how much I loved. (No I don't let her do it all the time)

14. Cookies just out of the oven - Hot, gooey, moist... Makes me want one now!

15. Little kids who dress themselves - Hey they my be mixed-matched, with clothes on backwards, or not have their hair not combed but seriously, when is that never cute?

16. Waving at the person in the car next to you at a red light - If you get the courage one day I strongly suggest you do this, the outcome is hilarious!

17. The time of night when everything is funny - Yes we all know what I mean, and yes we have all done it! I'm not sure if everything is funny because we are tired or if our brains are messed up by that time, but it is funny.

18. Inside Jokes - When are those never funny?

19. Long time best friends - You can tell them everything, they understand you, tell you the honest truth, and pretty much love you no matter what

20. Seeing what your parents looked like in high school - Yes, we've all done it, and one day our kids will too. It's the never ending mean/comical cycle!

Dissection of the Awesome List: 1-10

I am dissecting the list I just wrote last night so sit back and relax as I share why I think these things are awesome.

1. When kids hit the age that you are the best person ever - You know how little kids get so attached to one person and they think that they are the bee's knees? I mean seriously, who doesn't enjoy that?

2. Laughing at a stranger with another stranger - We have all done it. Whether it be the person in front of you who is buying crazy things or the person at the gym who is really into their work-outs, and music.

3. The smell of the library - Okay old books, 'nuff said.

4. Newborn baby smell - Heaven in a baby.

5. When someone has already highlighted the answers in your used textbook - Okay that is quite possible the best thing ever, lazy, but so awesome!

6. Sunday afternoon naps - Need I say more? Who doesn't like a Sunday afternoon nap?

7. Freshly washed cars - The shimmer of the car and the smell of fresh wax, nothing beats it!

8. Little kids showing their muscles - So precious. Kids are the bomb, especially ones who show you their muscles.

9. Free food - The best kind of food. No doubt about it!

10. Seeing a skyline appear in the distance at sunset - It might just be my inner photographer talking but seriously isn't that like the prettiest thing ever? It just makes you feel... Peaceful, and in awe of what our Father created!

My list of Awesome

So there is this blog called "1000 Awesome Things".
Pretty funny, I encourage you to check it out! http://1000awesomethings.com

So I decided to make a list of my 100 awesome things (Note that I am almost 16 years old and these thing are purely awesome to a teenager)


1. When little kids hit the age where you are the best person ever
2. Laughing at a stranger with another stranger
3. The smell of the library
4. Newborn baby smell
5. When someone has already highlighted the answer in your pre-used textbook
6. Sunday afternoon naps
7. Freshly washed cars
8. Little kids showing you their muscles
9. Free food
10. Seeing a skyline appearing in the distance at sunset
11. The smell of the ocean
12. Laughs at a funeral
13. When your Grandma waits on you hand and foot
14. Cookies just out of the oven
15. Little kids who dress themselves
16. Waving at the person in the car next to you at a red light
17. The time late at night when everything is funny
18. Inside jokes
19. Long time best friends
20. Seeing what your parents looked like in high school
21. When you see or hear on a TV show or movie the name of your city
22. When someone saves you the last seat
23. Driving around with the windows down on the first warm day of Spring
24. Going on vacation an forgetting what day it is
25. Sleeping babies
26. When your fries order has a few onion rings inside
27. The night before a really big day
28. Seeing old people holding hands
29. Catching food in your mouth once and not being able to do it the next time
30. A little kids laugh
31. When you realize that your favorite book is being turned into a movie
32. Laughing so hard you cry
33. Letting the waves bury your feet in the sand
34. When a couple tells you how they met
35. Being the first one to know really important news
36. High-fiving babies
37. The one person laughing when you tell a horrible joke
38. When someone invites you to do something on a night you had nothing to do
39. Free ice cream samples
40. Tossing garbage into a garbage can far away
41. Admiring your newly cleaned room
42. The smell of freshly cut grass
43. The kids table
44. When your grandparents tell a funny story about your parents
45. Finding that the new top you bought has pockets
46. When you buy something and realize it was on sale
47. Leftover takeout
48. The last pieces of cake
49. Sneaking candy from home into the movie theater
50. Old people who asks where you are going to college when you are a freshmen in high school
51. When you look at your cell phone at there are a bunch of text messages waiting
52. When the lights go out in a thunderstorm
53. Family game night
54. Spit-takes
55. Waking up to the smell of sizzling bacon
56. When little kids let out adult burps
57. Sleeping with one leg out of the covers one leg under
58. Untangling a knot you have been working forever on
59. Revisiting a place and realizing that it is a lot smaller now
60. Laughing so hard you make no sound
61. My dads laugh
62. Play-Doh
63. Watching someone sing and dance in the car next to you
64. When you realize that you did better then you thought
65. When someone gives you their last piece of gum
66. Looking at the clock just as it hits 12:34
67. When you receive a surprise check in the mail
68. When you spill something on you and it doesn't stain
69. Sleeping in freshly washed sheets
70. When someone says weird and funny secrets in their sleep
71. The smell of crayons
72. When you realize that your old enough to remember something
73. The take a Penny, leave a Penny bowl
74. When someone has the same name as you
75. The smell of the coffee aisle in a store
76. Finding that your birthday is on Friday or Saturday next year
77. The smell of a campfire
78. Getting truckers to blow their horns
79. The first shower after not taking a shower for a long time
80. Using Rock-Paper-Scissors to solve anything
81. The smell of gasoline
82. Finding money you didn't even know you lost
83. New car smell
84. Getting to the cash register to pay and the stranger in front of you already has
85. Forgetting someones name and remembering it just before they come talk to you
86. Realizing that you are tall enough to reach something
87. Jumping contest
88. Pregnant ladies
89. Finding out that you aren't the youngest in the group
90. Open fields
91. Delayed reactions
92. Saying yes
93. Turning on the radio just as your favorite song starts
94. Knowing the question on Jeopardy
95. Forgetting you ordered something online then it just randomly showing up
96. Home school jokes
97. When your parents buy something that you really want
98. Receiving a gift that someone forgot to give you months ago on your birthday
99. Roasting the perfect marshmallow
100. When you realize that someone loves you


So yep, that is my list.
In my future blogs I will be discussing a few of these items so if you really want to know stay-tuned!